3.1 A Few Basic Family, Temporal & Geographical Locations
I was born in 1944 in Wichita, Kansas. My father, Virgil (1904-1967), who had grown up on a farm near Topeka, Kansas, was a master plumber who owned his own small business. My mother, Vera (1907-2008), the daughter of a postman in Wichita, was a housewife/mother. We lived in a modest, middle-class home with our black cocker spaniel, Duchess, in this largest city in Kansas (population 100,000). |
I am the third of their three sons. Merrill (1930-1991) was 14 years older, and Gary (1932-2010) was 12 years older. They were both married and gone from our home by the time I was eight, so in some ways I was like an only child. I had a very happy, well-cared-for childhood; I didn’t realize until later just how fortunate I was to have loving, responsible parents. From them I was gifted with my foundational experiences of (what I would later come to see is) God’s gracious compassionate love and restorative justice. I believe it has a lot to do with my basically idealistic, confident (only slightly spoiled!) temperment. At bottom, I’ve always been a “Kansas blue sky over waving golden wheat fields” person, looking toward the future with hope. The realism that would come to temper this came later. |
From about the 6th grade through my teen years, I was mostly interested in sports and being a good student; I was especially interested in science and history. In high school--the largest and one of the most integrated in the state--I was a three sport athlete (cross-country, basketball and track) intensely focused on winning state championships. Through sports I learned how good it felt to set high goals and work hard to achieve them. And through my studies my joy of reading and learning blossomed during this time. Going to school and playing sports with a lot of African-Americans (“blacks” then) and some Hispanic and Asian Americans gave me an early, more justice-oriented perspective on race and poverty than my suburban cousins, nieces and nephews had.
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I was humbled when my parents took out a second mortgage on the house so I could go on a 1961 summer trip between my junior and senior years to Germany, Switzerland and Austria with German students from several Wichita high schools. This was an extremely formative experience for me, leading to an ever expanding lifelong interest in other cultures, languages and religions and an awe in the presence of the sublime beauty of God in nature--especially in mountains, seas, forests, sky and wild animals.
After my formal schooling and working a few years in local churches in Louisiana, in 1976 I chose Colorado (one of the most beautiful places in the world) as the ideal place for me to live.The late 1970s to early 1980s became one of the happiest periods of my life, because I found a loving, intelligent wife, Nancy, and two wonderful step-children, Willy (b. 1971) and Elizabeth (aka “Noodle,” b. 1975). However, after a few years, this marriage ended in disappointment; there was a painful separation for a year, followed by divorce. I was close, if not actually, clinically depressed for a while after that. Fortunately, I was able to keep in touch and support my step-children, especially in their sports, until they entered college.
These painful experiences of the dark side of life led me to be much more realistic about, and accepting of, the limitations of my own capabilities and goodness as well as that of others. Yet they also led me to have more “faith”--being even more trusting that God is always at work to help us move beyond even the greatest hurts, failures and tragedies toward a new fullness of life that joyfully surprises us. |
In the decade of the mid-1980s to mid-1990s, as a single person once again, I focused on further developing my professional skills. My oldest brother, Merrill, died of cancer at age 61. Claire and I found each other as we entered our 50s and were married in 1996. We served as co-pastors in two United Methodist churches in Colorado for a total of 14 years. My mother, who came to Colorado to live near us, surprised us all by living a long, healthy life before she died in her 101st year in 2008. We were fortunate having her in our lives those years. I felt as if the circle had closed somewhat, as I could return a least a little of the love and care she had given me, especially in my childhood and youth. My two step-children have been adults for almost two decades now (where does the time go?); they enjoy their very different professions: Will is an investment banker in New York City (he’s married to Kate and they have two children, Eddie and Susie) and Liz is a special needs teacher in the San Francisco area. |
Claire and I both have had some health challenges in the past few years, but fortunately are on the mend. Our experiences have made us much more personally aware of the vital importance of a quality health care system for all Americans.
(See the next page for a little information about my education.)
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